In moments of great import in our lives: perhaps an important sporting event, or when asking someone we like on a date, or before an important test, the feeling of nerves can take over.
In your body, nerves can translate into a shaking feeling in your hands, or a queasiness in your stomach. Perhaps your leg muscles tighten up. None of these conditions are particularly conducive to peak performance. We sometimes dread the feeling of nervousness.
But perhaps you can develop a new relationship with nerves. As with any feeling you might have, the way through that feeling is to welcome it, rather than resist it, and then to move forward with calm and confidence.
Let’s look at the positive side of nervousness. Often the very fact that you are feeling nerves indicates you are involved in an activity you care deeply about. You have a true passion! You are alive! While there might be a risk involved on the other side – perhaps you might lose the big match, or hit the wrong note on your featured guitar solo or get rejected by the person you have a crush on – the fact is that you are doing something you care about. Perhaps you can take a moment to feel some gratitude to be in the position you are in.
Gratitude alone is not going to dispel your nerves. But you can take some consolation that the top athletes and performers in the world all feel nerves. It is natural. It is healthy. And these great performers have learned techniques for using their nervous feelings to create positive energy and a state of peak performance.
Doing so takes continual practice. Just as you would practice hitting a topspin backhand and shooting free throws. You want to train your mind to relax and focus. Or looking at it another way, many of us have learned habits, since we are young, that contribute to our nervousness and negative thought patterns. So, finding calm is not so much learning something new as it is rediscovering a state of calm, curious, awareness, where we can find our optimal performance just waiting for us.
Let’s see how you can begin moving along that path:
You are standing at the baseline waiting to return serve in the first round of a big tennis tournament. You feel an uneasiness and also an excitement in your body. Your breathing is a little rushed. Your hand is shaking. Your legs are getting a little tight.
Thoughts start racing through your mind. You have been practicing very hard for weeks. You really have been playing well and beaten some good players in practice. But what if you mess up now? You glance to the viewing room and see your father glancing at you. Is he nervous? Will he be upset if you lose? You remember that the last tournament you played, you were up 5-2 in the first set and choked the next game away with two double faults.
The serve comes. It is softer than expected. You take your racquet back, but you are not in sync with the ball. You lunge and slightly mishit the ball and hit it wide by two feet. Oh no! What a bad start. You think to yourself, “I am choking already!”
Does that dialog sound familiar to you? We all have a constant conversation playing out in our heads. Often this conversation is not helpful and can even become quite destructive. Nerves can lead to cascading thoughts that then evolve into a wall of negativity. What is the alternative?
One key to finding the optimal state for match play is to continually focus your mind on the present moment. When your mind is engaged and engrossed in this moment, the myriad of other thoughts will fade to the background. The next time you play a practice match, here is a routine you can follow. This is a continual practice that you will do between every single point. From the first moment of the match until the last, you will be engaged in the moment, you will notice other thoughts as they come into your awareness and welcome them, and then let them go.
Here are the steps to follow.
- At the conclusion of each point, place your racquet in your opposite hand. Squeeze your playing hand for two seconds and then let it relax.
- Take a deep breath through your nose, filling your entire lungs and let the breath leave your body through your mouth. Allow yourself to take all the time you need for these relaxing breaths.
- Notice whatever you are feeling in your body in that moment. Perhaps your jaw is clenched. Or maybe your biceps are tight. It is important that you name these sensations to yourself. “My temples are pulsing”. Or, “My stomach feels very tight”. Or, “I feel my toes pressing against the front of my shoes.” There is nothing that is right or wrong for you to notice. Just be in the moment and see what is present for you. If you happen to be nervous, or angry, or frustrated, these emotions always represent themselves with some physical sensation in your body. Your goal is not to dismiss or try to stop these feelings but simply to let yourself feel them.
- Take a moment to center yourself on the situation of the match. Perhaps you just missed a dropshot and you want to remind yourself to give a little more lift when you execute this type of shot. Or you need to keep your head up when hitting your second serve. And you have a new point coming up, consider your strategy for the serve or return.
- And finally, as you step to the service line or ready your body to return serve, summon the mental state that will produce your best tennis. Say to yourself, “I am relaxed. I am confident. I am having fun!” You can repeat these words with a smile on your face. Lift up your chest. Even whisper them aloud. You are fortunate to be on the tennis court, competing, and playing the game you love. Enjoy the moment!
These five steps can easily be accomplished in the 25 seconds between points. Your goal is to develop this or a similar mental process between EVERY SINGLE point of your match. With your mind focussed in on the present it will not wander on to all the other negative thought patterns and emotions that get in the way of your optimal performance.
Welcome your nerves and embrace the excitement and challenge of a competitive tennis match. Use every moment between points to notice what is present and find the relaxed intensity that will lead you to success in the next point!